Flint Knits

a Golden Snitch, for my niece.
[raveled]

Happy Winter, all!

The Failure: I didn’t win that contest. I didn’t even make it into the semi-finals! Since I had waaaay more votes than everyone else (thanks, guys!), I can only assume this is because I didn’t follow the rules (big surprise). When one of the people organizing the contest sent me a Flickr message inviting me to submit my picture, I just did it. What I did not do was bother to read the terms of the contest, which apparently include a rule declaring that photos must be head-to-toe. Fail!

On a happier note, Laurynn (who just knit a thong, by the way) is the lucky winner of a $20 woolgirl.com gift certificate. Woo hoo!

The Success: The stripey/pooley Charade sock? Turned out gorgeous.

Just a tiny bit of pooling around the instep, which I think I can live with. In fact, I was so thrilled by how lovely Sandra’s pattern is in variegated yarn that, instead of knitting the second sock, I immediately cast on for another pair in a different variegated colorway.

The Robot: My niece Claire had her first birthday this week, and she obviously needed a wildly inappropriate gift from Cool Aunt Pam.

pattern: Bender Bending Rodriguez, by Soph Viklund
yarn: Plymouth Dreambaby DK and Debbie Bliss Cashmerino Baby 
ravelry link (includes list of my mods to the original pattern)

If you aren’t familiar with Futurama, Bender is a foul-mouthed, cigar-smoking, poker-playing robot who bends metal and is fueled entirely by booze.

Perfect for an infant, no?

Fortunately, Claire’s parents are Futurama fans, and were thus superjazzed about the gift,

and her grandparents don’t watch the show, so they just saw a cute robot toy,

and Claire herself discovered immediately how flingable wee Bender is, with those long, grippable arms and legs.

So everyone wins. Happy Birthday, Claire!

 I’m 30 today!

pattern: Quick Cupcake, by Hannah Kaminsky
yarn: scraps, plus white puffy paint
Ravelry link

If you want to give a gift? Tell everyone you know to go vote in the Kaboodle spring dress contest — I’m being overtaken by a high school girl in a Wet Seal tunic! Not cool.

Monkey: We hereby dub thee … Ramona Bananapants.

First of all, it just rolls of the tongue, doesn’t it? Ramona Bananapants. Ramona Bananapants.

Second, it evokes a lovely kind of sexual/gender ambiguity: I mean, she’s Ramona! But she’s got a Banana in her Pants! (Take that, heteronormative gender fascists!) And, since Ramona lives on a queer grad student’s shelf where she regularly fondles (and, let’s be honest, humps) an ironically framed photo of Michel Foucault, it just seemed right.

Unfortunately, while Blogless Canadian Rebecca (yes, that’s her real name) chose the winning name, her entry came after the official deadline. SO, she is the proud winner of bragging rights and a small consolation prize.

The Woolgirl gift certificate will go to the runner up: the fabulous Heather, who suggested “Snatch” as a nod to Ramona’s vaginer-like countenance. As Ryan pointed out, sexually-themed names were clearly the way to go in this contest.

But don’t feel bad, Blogless Canadian Rebecca! I mean, no one remembers who got the crown when Vanessa Williams was robbed.

Thanks so, so much to everyone who entered those hilarious, adorable, thoughtful, and clever names. This was my favorite contest ever.

Oh, and I finished a pair of socks. Yeah, that’s right. A PAIR.

pattern: Nancy Bush’s Child’s First Sock in Shell Pattern, from Knitting Vintage Socks
yarn: Koigu Premium Merino, color #2504, from Yarnzilla
needles: 2.5mm Addi circulars

modifications: skipped 1 pattern repeat; substituted eye of partridge heel + wedge toe.

If you’re a sock knitter who hasn’t made this pattern yet, Do It. It was one of the most satisfying sock-knitting experiences I’ve ever had. That might have something to do with the yarn, though — semi-solid Koigu has never let me down.

And I only waited 8 months in between the two socks! (Laura is my sister in this — see her salty recipe for how to defeat Second Sock Syndrome. Or check out Megan’s strategy for embracing it.)

Happy Hump Day, all! I’m going to go spend mine with Ramona and Michel.
If you know what I mean.
(Know what I mean?)

I crafted (instead of just buyin’)
a gift for my awesome friend Ryan.
But what did I make?
A bird, or a snake?
or a hippo? or penguin? or lion?

Though Ryan’s a dreadful pool-shooter,
he couldn’t be smarter or cuter.
But to my dismay,
he lives far away,
so we chat a lot on the computer.

And on G-Chat’s weird smiley-designer
there’s a monkey! Oh, what could be finer?
(Though, once it’s assembled,
it also resembles
a hamburger or a vaginer.)

(seriously. if you use gchat, try it.) :(|)

So yarn and some beads (two the same)
and stuffing and beans soon became
this birthday gift of
a monkey to love.
Now won’t someone give it a name?

No monkey deserves this position,
to suffer this name-less condition.
No more can we stall it!
But what shall we call it?
Please enter a contest submission.

Only one entry per knitter:
a name that will fit him (or fit her).
Then Ryan will choose
which handle to use
as the one he bestows on the critter.

Deadline: 11:59pm Eastern Time on Monday, March 17.
The winner will receive a $20 Wool Girl gift certificate.
Bring on the names!

pattern: Crocheted Monkey by ChimuChimu
yarn: Lana Grossa Meilenweit 50 Cotton, with pink Koigu KPM scraps